Category: Relationships

Breakup 2.0

Been dumped or need to dump someone? Break-ups in the web 2.0 world are a lot more challenging than simply chucking all the trinkets, photos and love letters of a former (or soon-to-be former) flame, what with the fact that a lot of online friends and acquaintances could be privy to the upheavals in your lovelife by reading your blogs and forum postings, or that your jilted lover could easily stalk you online.

Bostonist gives a basic guide to breaking up in the web 2.0 (and mobile) world.


Social Networking:

  • Set relationship status to “single” on all your social networking accounts.
  • Set your MySpace blog to “friends only.”
  • Remove ex from your MySpace friends. Replace the ex in your top 8 with your more attractive, more intelligent, and single new crush. Bonus points for the newly “topped” friend who leaves semi-flirtatious messages in MySpace comments.
  • Delete comments or testimonials the ex has left you.
  • Remove them as a friend on Friendster – know their “friends of friends” network just dropped by 1/2 a mil.


Blink by Malcolm GladwellThere is no such thing as thinking without using your brain, but Gladwell’s book, “Blink! The Power of Thinking Without Thinking” pretty much captures easily how first-impressions and gut feelings could often turn out to be right, or why, when encumbered by our prejudices, our power to make snap-decisions can result in negative, expensive or even tragic consequences.

Gladwell works around the subject of thin-slicing, or knowing which information to discard and which to keep in rapid decision-making, performed “without thinking,” which the author argues is better utilized than relying on logic, information or reasoning. However, the irony of this way of thinking is that it is actually a product of constant, multiple exposure to a particular subject or situation that eventually led the individual to quickly identify tell-tale signs required in predicting, say, if a relationship will succeed, or identify the personality traits of a particular person in as short as a 15-minute visit to his or her room.

“…with experience we become experts at using our behavior and our training to interpret–and decode–what lies behind our snap judgements and first impressions.”

On the other hand, rapid cognition is not without it’s fault as it is prone to our prejudices. Oftentimes, race, gender and appearance affect the way people make first impressions. That is why the best thin-slicers are the ones who have reached a certain level of expertise and gathered enough experience that eventually allow them to identify the subtlest nuances of a person’s behavior, or why at first glance they can tell with almost certainty that an artwork is not authentic.

Oftentimes, we come up with too much excuses–faulty reasoning–for why we make certain decisions, instead of asking ourselves why certain traits raise so much red flags when we meet a particular person for the first time, or why we settle not necessarily for less but for what we already know is not right and definitely not what we are looking for:

…what happens is that we come up with a plausible-sounding reason for why we might like or dislike something, and then we adjust our true preference to be in-line with that plausible-sounding reason.

Banksyfied Paris Hilton, Asia’s hottest, wiki model, romance

  • 100 Hottest Companies in Asia – Red Herring is unveiling within the next few days a series of 100 hottest companies in Asia, which is a list of what it considers the most promising startups:

    The 100 companies on this list could serve as a snapshot of the pecking order of venture capitalism during the past year in Asia. They represent 10 countries, with the largest number of companies, 33, from China, followed by India (24) and South Korea (20). Of course, there are selections from Japan, Taiwan, and Singapore. We also found companies we liked in Australia, Malaysia, the Philippines, and even Sri Lanka.

  • Banksy gets a go at Hilton.

    Hundreds of Paris Hilton albums have been tampered with in the latest stunt by “guerrilla artist” Banksy.

    Banksy has replaced Hilton’s CD with his own remixes and given them titles such as Why am I Famous?, What Have I Done? and What Am I For?

    He has also changed pictures of her on the CD sleeve to show the US socialite topless and with a dog’s head.

    More at BBC News.

    Click here for more images of Paris Hilton’s Banksy-fied album.

  • New Websites Seeking Profit in Wiki Model – A nice New York Times article about how startups are harnessing the power of wikis.
  • Is It Over? Log on and See – Another Times piece on the role that social networks play in today’s romance and breakups. Note: your status is important. 

So We Can’t Hurt Anymore

You won’t see me hanging around like a long lost friend
With my ear glued to some pay phone calling you up again
Cause I’ve had all of the one last times
I’ll crawl in or out that door
And this pointing finger’s all crooked and worn
And it won’t shift the blame no more
We’re out of pictures to hide the fist holes
Covering this bedroom wall
And I’m out of whiskey and I’m so out of touch
That I don’t give a damn at all
And I’m not sure when our love went south
But it left a long time ago
And left us stranded like a dog in the rain
And we keep diggin up old bones
Oh the words we’ve tossed around
Like a leaf in a storm
Until we broke each others hearts so bad
That we can’t hurt anymore
And what a low down crying shame
The walls we build around our souls
Just to protect ourselves from the ones we love
So we can’t hurt anymore.

Jon Randall