Have the courage to fail big and stick around

Elizabethtown is one of those films that showed promise but didn’t do well amongst mass audiences. Maybe one has to go through some real issues in one’s life to really appreciate the message behind the film. For others, may be it is enough to be a fan of Orland Bloom, who is reprising his role as Legolas in the next installment of The Hobbit.

Following the arch of its more successful predecessors, Jerry Maguire and Almost Famous, this is the story of Drew Baylor (Orlando Bloom) who gets sacked for costing his company nearly a billion dollars on a terrible shoe design. To make matters worse, his father dies while on a visit to Georgia, and he has to make funeral arrangements that conflict with what his extended family prefers. On the flight to the south, he meets bubbly attendant, Claire (Kirsten Dunst), who has relationship issues of her own, but remains on the brighter side of things. She falls for him, he is too focused on his troubles to care.

What follows captures the idea of a supportive partner, the courage to break the rules, and the are we/are we not a couple conundrum.

Back in the day, Orlando Bloom was one of the hottest commodities in Hollywood, following his portrayal of Legolas, possibly the most gorgeous elf that strutted in Middle Earth and slayed hundreds of orcs with a flick of his bow and arrow. His fame was then confirmed with the popularity of Pirates of the Caribbean, although he was outshined by Johnny Depp and even Keira Knightly, both of whom were eventually nominated for Oscars in succeeding roles.

Relatable.

Elizabethtown didn’t do well in the box office, but if you can see past the less than stellar chemistry between the two leads; or Paula Deen’s appearance as Drew’s aunt; or holes in the plot line, you just might end up feeling good about this film, which after all is about love, courage, and redemption.

Side note: In the real world, how a shoe model that has no way of getting sold goes to mass market is unthinkable; more so is the idea of blaming everything on the shoe designer and not on someone higher up the pecking order.

You’re still written in the scars on my heart*

Today, I was doing fine and well…until I heard this:
“I never stopped. You’re still written in the scars on my heart.”
(I hate you Nate Ruess.)

And thought…my god, that was me. I haven’t gotten completely over the pain and the thought of what might have been. Is it because you still keep showing up? Or that I carry the burden of the memory that you left behind? 

I thought I was done with the heartache, but I realised I have been carrying you all along and letting your memory cut through my heart and leave scars that will always be there. Sometimes, pain catches us unaware and the simplest words from a song shake us out of our pretentions that we have finally healed. I thought I was okay, and honestly wished I were, but why is the pain still there?

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* Just Give Me A Reason by P!ink ft. Nate Ruess

On love: words that take your breath away

Love is not who you were expecting, love is not who you can predict. Maybe love is in New York City, already asleep, and you are in California, Australia, wide awake. Maybe love is always in the wrong time zone, maybe love is not ready for you. Maybe you are not ready for love. Maybe love just isn’t the marrying type. Maybe the next time you see love is twenty years after the divorce, love is older now, but just as beautiful as you remembered. Maybe love is only there for a month. Maybe love is there for every firework, every birthday party, every hospital visit. Maybe love stays- maybe love can’t. Maybe love shouldn’t.

Love arrives exactly when love is supposed to, and love leaves exactly when love must. When love arrives, say, “Welcome. Make yourself comfortable.” If love leaves, ask her to leave the door open behind her. Turn off the music, listen to the quiet, whisper, “Thank you. Thank you for stopping by.”

— From Sarah Kay and Phil Kaye’s presentation of their realistic view of love.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotted Mind

No matter how painful some of my memories are, I’d still like to keep them. I learn from them and when the pain is over, knowing that I overcame them becomes a source of inspiration and courage. What doesn’t kills you can make you stronger, right? Of course it is different from many others.

“Being able to control memory doesn’t simply give us admin access to our brains. It gives us the power to shape nearly every aspect of our lives. There’s something terrifying about this. Long ago, humans accepted the uncontrollable nature of memory; we can’t choose what to remember or forget. But now it appears that we’ll soon gain the ability to alter our sense of the past.
“The problem with eliminating pain, of course, is that pain is often educational. We learn from our regrets and mistakes; wisdom is not free. If our past becomes a playlist—a collection of tracks we can edit with ease—then how will we resist the temptation to erase the unpleasant ones? Even more troubling, it’s easy to imagine a world where people don’t get to decide the fate of their own memories. “My worst nightmare is that some evil dictator gets ahold of this,” Sacktor says. “There are all sorts of dystopian things one could do with these drugs.” While tyrants have often rewritten history books, modern science might one day allow them to rewrite us, wiping away genocides and atrocities with a cocktail of pills.
“Those scenarios aside, the fact is we already tweak our memories—we just do it badly. Reconsolidation constantly alters our recollections, as we rehearse nostalgias and suppress pain. We repeat stories until they’re stale, rewrite history in favor of the winners, and tamp down our sorrows with whiskey.”


WIRED: The Forgetting Pill Erases Painful Memories Forever